Tips for shy children - can a activity group help?

Having a shy and reserved child can often be a worry for parents. In this situation you fear your child may not develop to their full potential nor interact well with others which will impact the rest of their lives. That’s why it is important that information, help and advice is available in order to help build your children’s self esteem and confidence straight away. These top tips provided by Dr Victoria Samual from Super nanny expert are great tips to have, so we at The Sing Stars MK Project have provided her list for you,

“1. It’s vital you avoid labelling your child as shy or nervous, either directly to your child or when talking about her to others. Labels stick and rapidly lead to a self-fulfilling prophecy.

You may have banished all labels, but what happens if you keep coming up against “isn’t she shy” declarations from teachers, friends or family - said with conviction in front of your little one?Ensure your child is left with a positive view of themselves by calmly and confidently bouncing by the generalisation with a subtle reframing: “Katie likes to think things through before rushing in” or “Danny likes to listen to others before sharing his views”.

2. If your child is upset or fearful, accept feelings with warmth and concern: “it sounds as if you’re feeling nervous, that’s understandable”.

Tempting though it may be, avoid dismissing or ‘taking away’ feelings eg “don’t be silly, big boys don’t get shy”. These kinds of comments lead children to feel that their inner states are not valid. This can be confusing and lead to anxiety. Children whose feelings are accepted and supported by their parents tend to be much more ‘emotionally literate’, confident and secure.

3. Normalise doubts by talking about a generic other: “everyone feels unsure from time to time” or by referring to situations you find daunting and how you attempt to overcome them: “sometimes I feel worried about speaking up at work, but I always make and effort and feel good afterwards”. Use story books to introduce themes of facing fears or overcoming challenges.

4. Children learn social skills from watching others so model the kind of interactions you want to encourage: be warm and friendly with people you don’t know, introduce yourself to new people, ask people for help, give compliments to friends and thank others for their time.

5. Think about the specific situations that make your little one run for cover and identify skills that may help equip them for better managing these daunting scenarios. Use role play to help them rehearse these skills. For example if your child shrinks into the corner at birthday parties set up a party scene and use favourite toys or teddies to act out different interactions: giving the party girl their present; saying hello to other children; asking the adult where the toilet is; saying thank you on leaving.

6. Once you’ve practiced through play, gently encourage new activities by providing manageable opportunities for success. Take a gradual, step-by-step approach. For example, if you’re child is nervous about starting Brownies, take her along to watch the group for the first week, then suggest she joins in at the end for ten minutes the next week whilst you stay in the room. Then build up to leaving the room for brief periods. Before long, she will be bouncing into the group and happily taking part in the full session.

7. It’s crucial you hide any doubts or anxieties you may have about your little’s one’s ability to cope. Combine empathy for her feelings (see point 2) with confident assertions that you have faith in her: “Ahh, I can see you’re feeling a bit worried, but I’m really confident you’ll be able to handle it”.

8. It’s tempting when faced with a wary, cautious little person to step in to do things for them, however this can be counterproductive. When your child is approaching new situations or learning new things, try to step back from interfering too much as this may make him hesitant and reliant on others. Let your child learn through exploration and trial & error; this will help him to develop a sense of personal mastery and confidence.

9. Help boost your little one’s self-esteem by using descriptive praise to clearly identify specific behaviours that you value: “you said hello even though you felt nervous, that was really brave”. This will help your child to develop an inner sense of achievement and pride.

10. Show physical affection and regularly and repeatedly tell your child how much she is loved. Warm, playful and affectionate interactions with your child will fill them with a sense of being valued and accepted; crucial for developing the inner self-confidence required for approaching and interacting with others.

11. If your child is chronically sad and withdrawn, is unable to face any social situations, has suddenly changed from being outgoing to quiet and anxious, or if they show absolutely no interest in interacting with others, it would be worth considering getting professional support. Make an appointment with your GP to discuss options.” Dr Victoria Samuel Supernanny Expert  www.sunpernanny.co.uk

Shyness is a perfectly normal trait in childhood, it needn't be a major concern. It may hold a child back socially, and sometimes impacts on their progress and development so any encouragement and confidence builders would ofcourse be beneficial. Children often need a little help in overcoming their shyness so by following Dr Samuals tips you will certainly be heading in the right direction with your child. Ofcourse shyness may be something your child will naturally grow out of. 

But to help your little ones along, perhaps a childrens activity group might help. I would recommend perhaps a group drama club, or singing school. For parents near Buckinghamshire why not try Sing Stars MK.

Sing Stars is Milton Keynes very own Singing Group for children aged from 5-16 years old. Sing Stars MK is a fun and friendly group activity for your little budding singers. They will help develop your childrens vocal skills and talents, but above all they will help them to make lots of new friends, boost their own self confidence and show them just how fun creative arts can be.

Sing Stars nurture and develop each childs love of singing and to encourage their energy and enthusiasm for performance. Unlike National Theatre and Drama Schools their classes are affordable and are at convenient times to suit busy Mums and Dads. Their classes hold a maximum of 15 children to allow them to focus on the needs of every child attending the group.

Children of all ages and abilities are welcome! No audition is required! They give every child a chance to shine!

Classes are run midweek, through term times with a show at the end of each term for mums and dads. Summer Holiday Sing Star Club is also available. Places are limited but to avoid waiting lists new classes are added to meet the demand. Please request your childs space on the next starting Club.

Classes are set to Sing Star Sparklers 5-7 Sing Star Juniors 8-12 and Sing Stars Teens 13-16

There is lots of fun singing techniques and songs are suited to the age group. Glee, High School Musical, Rock School , Just Bieber , Hannah Montanna are the popular hits for Sing Star Sparklers and Juniors, with Katy Perry, Jessie Jay, One Direction , Glee being the teen choices. We also sing songs from the musicals and show and other artists they like!!

Prices are £4 per class or there is the option to pay termly, there are also offers on Siblings in the club, referals and more...

Please contact us for information on the next available courses for the Sing Stars Singing Club.  If you would like to find out more or book your place on a class , to find out more, or be given website and social networking links please contact via this form

Sing Stars Mk also offer Private Singing Lessons and Childrens Party Entertainment... please call or email for details 07540801395

Is there too much pressure on our children to be the best?

With programmes like Britains Got Talent, the X Factor , Got to DANCE, THE VOICE and the like, I worry that children are now put under a lot of pressure to be the best. Not just as a result of these programmes ofcourse, but as a matter of modern culture! Surely we want happy well rounded children not competitive children under pressure to be the best, to win and to beat others! Its the taking part that counts, joining in and helping others should be the rewarding part, not the winning!!! The point is that our children cannot be the “best” at everything , so is pushing them the best option when considering their self esteem and the development of a healthy self confidence? Id suggest perhaps not! The most IMPORTANT thing is that our children are happy , feel great about themselves and fulfil their potential with gentle encouragement not pressure and force.  Of course some competition is good, its good to strive for things and great to TRY but there is so much pressure on children at the moment and its about time we recognised that there are a lot more talents to have than being the best singer, the best footballer , the highest jumper, the cleverist in class. Lets start to REWARD children for helping another child, learning to read a longer word, helping with putting things away, being polite to another person. Simply talents that will help them form relationships and live communicative and social lives which inturn will help academically, educationally, developmentally and socially. Children have to deal with exam stress, peer pressure,  media influences and lots of other worried as they learn and grow. Its no wonder children sometimes find it hard to reach their potential and have low self confidence.  . The last thing they need when they get home is a pushy parent! So here are a few things that may help: Boost esteem don’t flatten it, encourage positivity, encourage ambition, encourage improvement, encourage empowerment, but in a safe and heathy way… HOW YOU ASK? PRAISE PRAISE PRAISE OK, so all children cannot be the best, but most good childrens after school clubs and classes should promote team play, improving social and communication skills, developing talents and being apart of a team. As the experts say you cannot always win, but you can always TRY!! Try to be your best , try to be a good team player , trying equals as much reward!! So for parents in Milton Keynes why not try Sing Stars MK for your children. We promote team and group work. We allow children of all abilities to join us, giving every child the chance to shine. We reward all improvements and help childrens esteem while they have fun! Not all children can have the best voice, sing the highest note, sing the loudest so we help children with all levels of talent improve their voices, have fun and become a part of a team. Sing Stars is based in Milton Keynes and is available for children aged from 5-16 years old. Sing Stars MK is a fun and friendly group activity for your little budding singers. They will help develop your childrens vocal skills and talents, but above all they will help them to make lots of new friends, boost their own self confidence and show them just how fun creative arts can be. Sing Stars nurture and develop each childs love of singing and to encourage their energy and enthusiasm for performance. Unlike National Theatre and Drama Schools their classes are affordable and are at convenient times to suit busy Mums and Dads. Their classes hold a maximum of 15 children to allow them to focus on the needs of every child attending the group. Children of all ages and abilities are welcome! No audition is required! They give every child a chance to shine! Classes are run midweek, through term times with a show at the end of each term for mums and dads. Summer Holiday Sing Star Club is also available. Places are limited but to avoid waiting lists new classes are added to meet the demand. Please request your childs space on the next starting Club. Classes are set to Sing Star Sparklers 5-7 Sing Star Juniors 8-12 and Sing Stars Teens 13-16 There is lots of fun singing techniques and songs are suited to the age group. Glee, High School Musical, Rock School , Just Bieber , Hannah Montanna are the popular hits for Sing Star Sparklers and Juniors, with Katy Perry, Jessie Jay, One Direction , Glee being the teen choices. We also sing songs from the musicals and show and other artists they like!! Prices are £4 per class or there is the option to pay termly, there are also offers on Siblings in the club, referals and more... Please contact us for information on the next available courses for the Sing Stars Singing Club.  If you would like to find out more or book your place on a class , to find out more, or be given website and social networking links please contact via this form Sing Stars Mk also offer Private Singing Lessons and Childrens Party Entertainment... please call or email for details 07540801395

Can teaching children to value themselves and others help them develop?

We at Sing Stars pride our classes on developing childrens self esteem, encourage them to try, to have respect for themselves and others, without judging each other on our weaknesses but our strengths.

Empowerment and confidence are key ingredient in maximizing children's potential in academic achievement, social success, and personal happiness. This is an obviously an arduous process; it is not instantly going to be achieved. It is important that many methods combine together to reach the desired result. There are many innovative forms of empowerment methods available, but the most important thing here is that we do what we can to show children that they have self worth and individuality that they must be proud of. They must VALUE THEMSELVES and OTHERS for a happy and social connective life.

By obtaining a strong relationship with themselves they will equip themselves with abilities and positivity to try. They will then evolve into helping each other which will inevitably result in a connection and empowerment of children globally. Children process information from the world around them much differently than adults, they have distinct needs for managing the effects of stress and trauma but with a highly developed sense of consciousness for their feelings, they will then be able to manage fear, anger, anxiety and any other circumstances trying to cause effect to their wellbeing.

With a healthy sense of individuality, children will be able to help themselves and help others with respect, sensitivity and empathy, resulting in the connectivity of children worldwide.

So the main quest for adults is to help children learn valuable life skills early, which will mean that they will be better able to deal with challenging situations when they are older. Thus nurturing their own strives for personal life enrichment.

The empowerment of children to find their true values and voices is a statement , which was the inspiration behind the motivation for Sing Stars. Sing Stars teaches children to sing and develop their voices and encourages their joy for singing and performing. But it is also to develop their confidence, give them a strength to vocalise their thoughts, express their emotions and to show them that if they try, practice and work hard anything is possible beyond their own worries and weaknesses. Sing Stars teaches children to value themselves and their talents aswell as valueing others while they form great friendships in the singing club.

Sing Stars is Milton Keynes very own Singing Group for children aged from 5-16 years old. Sing Stars MK is a fun and friendly group activity for your little budding singers. They will help develop your childrens vocal skills and talents, but above all they will help them to make lots of new friends, boost their own self confidence and show them just how fun creative arts can be.

Sing Stars nurture and develop each childs love of singing and to encourage their energy and enthusiasm for performance. Unlike National Theatre and Drama Schools their classes are affordable and are at convenient times to suit busy Mums and Dads. Their classes hold a maximum of 15 children to allow them to focus on the needs of every child attending the group.

Children of all ages and abilities are welcome! No audition is required! They give every child a chance to shine!

Classes are run midweek, through term times with a show at the end of each term for mums and dads. Summer Holiday Sing Star Club is also available. Places are limited but to avoid waiting lists new classes are added to meet the demand. Please request your childs space on the next starting Club.

Classes are set to Sing Star Sparklers 5-7 Sing Star Juniors 8-12 and Sing Stars Teens 13-16

There is lots of fun singing techniques and songs are suited to the age group. Glee, High School Musical, Rock School , Just Bieber , Hannah Montanna are the popular hits for Sing Star Sparklers and Juniors, with Katy Perry, Jessie Jay, One Direction , Glee being the teen choices. We also sing songs from the musicals and show and other artists they like!!

Prices are £4 per class or there is the option to pay termly, there are also offers on Siblings in the club, referals and more...

Please contact us for information on the next available courses for the Sing Stars Singing Club.  If you would like to find out more or book your place on a class , to find out more, or be given website and social networking links please contact via this form

Sing Stars Mk also offer Private Singing Lessons and Childrens Party Entertainment... please call or email for details 07540801395

Do confident children achieve more?

Confidence allows children to develop better relationships , communication skills and social skills. Reading body language and facial expressions is crucial for forming relationships and connecting and understanding the world. Ultimately, learning these skills are empowering for a child. Without these skill their achievement potential is lessened. With these skills a child will be less fearful and more willing to try.

Low confidence, anxiety and poor self-esteem leads to under-performance, unpopularity, and greatly reduced happiness and satisfaction with life. And of course we want our children to live happy, healthy fulfilled lives, with the attitude that they CAN reach potentials, enjoy life and be open to many amazing and life changing possibilities.

So with this YES a child will achieve more with confidence, as confidence brings self esteem, a value for themselves and their skills. So what can we do to help?

So how can we help our children be more confident?

We at Sing Stars MK, offer confidence building singing club lessons that aim to do just that!!

Sing Stars is Milton Keynes very own Singing Group for children aged from 5-16 years old. Sing Stars MK is a fun and friendly group activity for your little budding singers. They will help develop your childrens vocal skills and talents, but above all they will help them to make lots of new friends, boost their own self confidence and show them just how fun creative arts can be.

Sing Stars nurture and develop each childs love of singing and to encourage their energy and enthusiasm for performance. Unlike National Theatre and Drama Schools their classes are affordable and are at convenient times to suit busy Mums and Dads. Their classes hold a maximum of 15 children to allow them to focus on the needs of every child attending the group.

Children of all ages and abilities are welcome! No audition is required! They give every child a chance to shine!

Classes are run midweek, through term times with a show at the end of each term for mums and dads. Summer Holiday Sing Star Club is also available. Places are limited but to avoid waiting lists new classes are added to meet the demand. Please request your childs space on the next starting Club.

Classes are set to Sing Star Sparklers 5-7 Sing Star Juniors 8-12 and Sing Stars Teens 13-16

There is lots of fun singing techniques and songs are suited to the age group. Glee, High School Musical, Rock School , Just Bieber , Hannah Montanna are the popular hits for Sing Star Sparklers and Juniors, with Katy Perry, Jessie Jay, One Direction , Glee being the teen choices. We also sing songs from the musicals and show and other artists they like!!

Prices are £4 per class or there is the option to pay termly, there are also offers on Siblings in the club, referals and more...

Please contact us for information on the next available courses for the Sing Stars Singing Club.  If you would like to find out more or book your place on a class , to find out more please see www.kaleyentertainments.wix.com/singstars 

Sing Stars Mk also offer Private Singing Lessons and Childrens Party Entertainment... please call or email for details 07540801395

Using Arts and Crafts to help your child develop

Children are inherently curious and children naturally love art, painting, drawing , making music etc!! Arts and crafts provides a way for a child to create something unique which gives a child a positive, constructive way for them to express themselves and their thoughts. Physiologically, the human brain consists of 2 parts, the left and the right hemisphere. The left brain is used in logical thinking and analytical processes. This is typically what is trained in school work that consists of math, reading and science. The right brain is used in emotional perception, intuition and creativity. This is touched upon in schools but I believe we need to act on a childs creative development from babies as these skills will also be important to how they live their lives!

Arts and crafts are a great developmental tool for children: its fun and educational. Children can partake in groups to build confidence and social intergration. But they are also valued for their self expression and for their personal and unique masterpieces. Arts and crafts for children offers personal satisfaction and a child will feel proud of themselves for what they have solely achieved. At the same time as having great fun.

It is important that children understand it is ok to be unique, that we are all different , we all have different skills and unique talents. Providing this self belief and individuality appreciation at am early age will avoid the risk of getting a low self esteem, and will allow children to enjoy and explore themselves and their talents without the need to feel they must be the same as their friends or siblings!

Crafts offer new exciting experiences and sensations as well as improving fine motory skill. By controlling brushes, crayons, sculpting clay, building blocks etc a child will learn how to use their small muscles in their fingertips for example.

With arts and crafts the object is fun, mess, play and free personal expression. Your little ones will make unique masterpieces that they will be proud of, it is important that the masterpieces are valued and displayed in order to infuse their confidence. All children who make something personal and unique that is treasured will love their individuality and will be happy to try new things, explore more things and develop from strength to strength as a result. A child who has low self esteem will not take risks and will not reach their full potential nor live a happy,healthy life that a child deserves.

As well as offering children escapism , leaving the real world and entering a fun creative free creative world, it is also improving their coordination and manual dexterity. With lots of different crafts and tools many new skills and experiences can be tried.By taking part in arts and crafts a child will also improve and develop their concentration skills and perseverance. Both of which are useful skills to take into school and adult working environments. Pateince and an understanding that sometimes putting in the extra effort, extra time for the harder crafts will pay off.

The benefits of arts and crafts are:

· Creativity skills are important as it is through creativity children learn their uniqueness and express their feelings.

· Creative arts develop children’s fine motory skills

· Arts and Crafts offer new experiences and sensations

· Arts and crafts can be interactive and social if done in groups. A creative environment is a happy one for children.

· Arts and crafts allow for personal self expression and being valued and appreciated for their unique masterpeices

· Creativity builds confidence for unique personal expression

· Arts and crafts is a great source of quality time with parents, siblings

· Creative arts are fun and educational

· Arts and Crafts builds confidence and self esteem

· Arts and Crafts offer the chance to make choices and build decision making skills

· Creative arts allows children expresses their emotions

· Arts and crafts sessions are great escapism for children from the real world into a creative world

· Arts and Crafts improve coordination and manual dexterity

· The creative arts improve and nurture concentration skills and perseverance

· Arts and crafts teach patience and that to get excellent results it could take harder work and time

Tips to make the arts a part of your childs development:

• Always make arts and crafts supply available and accessible to your child - paper, pencil, crayons, etc.

• Celebrate your child’s artwork – hang their drawings on the wall or save it in a folder. That way, your child feels that their creation is important.

• Read books – Ask the librarian at your school or public library to suggest books about the arts. ( a great book to build self esteem and confidence is The Magic Sunglasses. www.themagicsunglasses.com )

• Notice the arts all around you – take your family to museums, creative days, toddler groups etc. Notice the art even in the parks, subways, and open spaces. Start a conversation about what you see.

• Enjoy the arts at home – share your artistic skills and interests with your children. Find out what your kids love about the art and crafts.

• If your kid shows great interest or talent in certain arts and crafts nurture their esteem

• If possible, remind your kid’s school authorities about the importance of art in her education.

How can you boost your children’s confidence?

When you feel confident you feel you can do more, when you lack confidence you subconsciously hold yourself back, and this is the same for children. To enable them to reach their full potential through their developmental ages and right the way through to adulthood, we need to nurture their self belief and confidence and make them feel good about themselves. Self esteem I believe to be a childs passport for life: It will allow them to live with a positive attitude, a will to try, to succeed, to live healthily , with self belief and respect for others. Even more importantly is, a healthy self esteem will encourage them to strive socially, intellectually, physically and grow into well-rounded and happy people!!

Gok Wan is helping our teens feel good about their bodies and self esteem which is great, but where is the help for our toddlers, pre schoolers and primary ages. As this is the most crucial when you think that this is their developmental age! Where they learn about themselves and others around them.

The best ways to promote confidence is through:

· Making your baby/child feel loved and valued with affection and love.

· Be a good role model , be confident, positive and happy yourself.

· Give quality time to each child. Play with them, read with them,etc

· Help your child realise their talents. Develop these talents and applaud their strengths

· Give your child responsibilities. Their own special jobs within the home. So they see they are an asset to a group.

· Encourage your child to be expressive and show their feelings. Releasing inhibitions is a great way to tackle low self esteem and will develop confidence. Communication skills and socialisation will become second nature to a child whom expresses their own feelings.

· Do not give your child attachment issues, show your baby/child that they are safe cuddling other people and not just mum and dad.

All of this can be achieved through the creative arts! Here are some ideas of what and where!!

· Reading creative books with your children is a great method for boosting self esteem and confidence. It gives you and your child quality time together which will make them feel special. It is allowing a child to learn words and language. It will improve your childs reading skills and will also allow conversation and feelings to be discussed in relation to the topic in the book. If you choose a book that is fun but also targets the issue of being brave, being confident, trying your best, not giving up etc a child will take that onboard. To help your child boost their self esteem and confidence I recommend the The Magic Sunglasses . This wonderful book written by Auriel Blanche discusses this very theme and there is also a workshop and interactive website to help children and parents dealing with esteem. www.themagicsunglasses.com

· Join baby toddler groups, these are great for social interaction. Musical toddler and baby groups are ideal. They allow children to be creative and have fun in a safe and relaxed environment. At the same time as building confidence and self esteem, they explore the musical instruments, nursery rhymes and action songs. Through doing so they learn to build the co-ordination skills, develop physically, socially and emotionally. A music class encourages interaction with other children, group activities, socialising, joining in and sharing. It also allows them to express themselves and a fun way to escape to a fun musical world away from the worries them may have. They may make friends and learn musical talents aswell. All in all they will feel valued as part of a group, gain self esteem and happiness as they are applauded for getting actions right, knowing the songs, playing the instruments and playing the games.It is also quality time with their parents so they will feel special. One I recommend is Musical Minis, they are all over the country . http://www.musicalminis.co.uk

Benefits of CREATIVE PLAY for children

When we think of helping our children to develop we usually think of academic qualities like reading, writing, maths and concentration. But we really need to add creativity to that list of beneficial qualities. It is with creativity our children not only have fun and explore skills to make arts and crafts, play instrument’s, write songs – but more importantly it is through creative play that children learn skills that will help them tackle everyday life. It will help them solve problems, learn about themselves and learn to live successful, fulfilling and happy lives.

Creative Play has: Intellectual Benefits , Physical Benefits , Emotional Benefits , Social Benefits

So with this in mind CREATIVITY is an asset we need to help all of our children nurture and develop. But I stress to parents with shy children more so….. Interactive Creative Play is essential self esteem building, confident boosting and positive thinking for their own self expression which ultimately will help them adapt to a social world where communication and connection to others will help them live fulfilled and empowered lives which will embed the notion of self respect, respect for others and the ambition to reach their full potential.

Creativity helps children reflect and understand their own feelings and inner thoughts, which ultimately helps them deal with issues and develop with a healthier outlook on their own strengths and abilities.They will try new things, learn new skills and be happy!

Being creatuve nurtures a childs emotional health as they explore personal feelings and experiences in a fun and playful way, without judgement. We as adults love “ME” time – the same is for children. Creative play allows for uniqueness , exploration of special talents and a fun playtime that draws the child away from stresses in their lives into their imagination and happy/safe place.

Creative learning shows children its fun to be spontaneous and impulsive. It allows children to have fun, to be playful without regimentation.Through which they can escape away from the real world.

How to help your child be creative:

Inspire them to be creative by being creative yourself. Perhaps act out scenarios which will explore their feelings and allow them to express themselves in a playful way.

Provide creative environment, provide equipment such as paints, moulding clay, pens, colouring pencils, props, puppets, costumes, toys , mud clay , plastersine, lego, building blocks, cuddly toys, musical instruments etc. Make time for creative play. And make it colourful with stimulus for inspiration and imagination.

Make objects, homemade things, great to find special talents and spending time escaping real life.

Dramatic play & improvisation, acting out scenarios will help children express their true inner feelings.

Creative movement playing games like head shoulders knees and toes , follow the leader and simon says is not only great for co-ordination but it teaches listening skills and interaction if in a big group.

Classes and groups – These are great for interaction as well as exploring their own self expression. These build social skills and emotional skills. A winning suggestion!!

www.themagicsunglasses.com has great interactive workshops for children. It also has a great creative workbook for parents and a great book which will help children imagination and self esteem.