Is there too much pressure on our children to be the best?

With programmes like Britains Got Talent, the X Factor , Got to DANCE, THE VOICE and the like, I worry that children are now put under a lot of pressure to be the best. Not just as a result of these programmes ofcourse, but as a matter of modern culture! Surely we want happy well rounded children not competitive children under pressure to be the best, to win and to beat others! Its the taking part that counts, joining in and helping others should be the rewarding part, not the winning!!! The point is that our children cannot be the “best” at everything , so is pushing them the best option when considering their self esteem and the development of a healthy self confidence? Id suggest perhaps not! The most IMPORTANT thing is that our children are happy , feel great about themselves and fulfil their potential with gentle encouragement not pressure and force.  Of course some competition is good, its good to strive for things and great to TRY but there is so much pressure on children at the moment and its about time we recognised that there are a lot more talents to have than being the best singer, the best footballer , the highest jumper, the cleverist in class. Lets start to REWARD children for helping another child, learning to read a longer word, helping with putting things away, being polite to another person. Simply talents that will help them form relationships and live communicative and social lives which inturn will help academically, educationally, developmentally and socially. Children have to deal with exam stress, peer pressure,  media influences and lots of other worried as they learn and grow. Its no wonder children sometimes find it hard to reach their potential and have low self confidence.  . The last thing they need when they get home is a pushy parent! So here are a few things that may help: Boost esteem don’t flatten it, encourage positivity, encourage ambition, encourage improvement, encourage empowerment, but in a safe and heathy way… HOW YOU ASK? PRAISE PRAISE PRAISE OK, so all children cannot be the best, but most good childrens after school clubs and classes should promote team play, improving social and communication skills, developing talents and being apart of a team. As the experts say you cannot always win, but you can always TRY!! Try to be your best , try to be a good team player , trying equals as much reward!! So for parents in Milton Keynes why not try Sing Stars MK for your children. We promote team and group work. We allow children of all abilities to join us, giving every child the chance to shine. We reward all improvements and help childrens esteem while they have fun! Not all children can have the best voice, sing the highest note, sing the loudest so we help children with all levels of talent improve their voices, have fun and become a part of a team. Sing Stars is based in Milton Keynes and is available for children aged from 5-16 years old. Sing Stars MK is a fun and friendly group activity for your little budding singers. They will help develop your childrens vocal skills and talents, but above all they will help them to make lots of new friends, boost their own self confidence and show them just how fun creative arts can be. Sing Stars nurture and develop each childs love of singing and to encourage their energy and enthusiasm for performance. Unlike National Theatre and Drama Schools their classes are affordable and are at convenient times to suit busy Mums and Dads. Their classes hold a maximum of 15 children to allow them to focus on the needs of every child attending the group. Children of all ages and abilities are welcome! No audition is required! They give every child a chance to shine! Classes are run midweek, through term times with a show at the end of each term for mums and dads. Summer Holiday Sing Star Club is also available. Places are limited but to avoid waiting lists new classes are added to meet the demand. Please request your childs space on the next starting Club. Classes are set to Sing Star Sparklers 5-7 Sing Star Juniors 8-12 and Sing Stars Teens 13-16 There is lots of fun singing techniques and songs are suited to the age group. Glee, High School Musical, Rock School , Just Bieber , Hannah Montanna are the popular hits for Sing Star Sparklers and Juniors, with Katy Perry, Jessie Jay, One Direction , Glee being the teen choices. We also sing songs from the musicals and show and other artists they like!! Prices are £4 per class or there is the option to pay termly, there are also offers on Siblings in the club, referals and more... Please contact us for information on the next available courses for the Sing Stars Singing Club.  If you would like to find out more or book your place on a class , to find out more, or be given website and social networking links please contact via this form Sing Stars Mk also offer Private Singing Lessons and Childrens Party Entertainment... please call or email for details 07540801395

Can we rely on parents and celebrities to be good role models?

We all know that children are at their most vulnerable and impressionable age. While they are learning and experiencing new things they are actively taking in anything and everything around them. A child will copy or imitate any behavior they see as they have no other option than to believe that this is the normal and correct way to act. A child is also blessed with having that innocence to behave in the exact way they feel at the exact time they wish to feel it. This is an act of impulse and not an act that they have necessarily observed.

Obviously in most cases the child's parents are the first form of positive learning. A child will copy a parent eat, drink, cover their mouth when they cough, clean their teeth, say sorry when they do something wrong and clean up when they make a mess. They can also learn valuable lesson from their parents like to get straight up and try again even when you've fallen over, learn to read, potty training, learn to share, learn what is right and learn what is wrong. It would be perfect if every parent was a perfect role model but we know this isn’t the case. We also know that many external factors like school, friends, tv programmes, computer games and the such can ruin all the perfect parents' hard work.

So for these reasons we cannot rely purely on parents alone for ROLE MODEL SECURITY even if they are ‘perfect parents’!

So then we look to people in the public eye. These being celebrities, famous actors, singers, athletes, olympians. Do our children really look to history for their role models nowadays? Unfortunately I think popular culture tends to rule when role models are concerned. But can we rely on real people being good role models. People make mistakes remember!! But maybe this is also ok to teach children…. So we have popular celebrities who do have positive effects without much threat of tabloid negativity. We have Peter Andre a great dad, who is encouraging the nation to help their children to enjoy reading again. We have Gok Wan helping our teens to be confident , have self belief to tackle their anxieties. We have Jamie Oliver encouraging healthy eating for our children. But unfortunately we have other role models causing controversy. With racism on the field with John Terry, Xfactor stars on drugs, Miley Cyrus caught on camera in nightly antics , can we really trust the celebrities? Where as I personally quite like Katie Price aka Jordan and appreciate her business and family focus, is it wise to let your child find a role model in her? Should a child look up to Victoria Beckham she may be a great mum and another business woman, but is promoting that beauty in being stick thin and having unhealthy diets a great way to teach your child to be. Is it wise that a child looks up to Lindsey Lohan in her many roles in children's films including Freaky Friday. When she is actually a misled lady involved in binge drinking and drugs?

Maybe we shouldn’t rely on the celebs? So if we cant rely on celebs or the parents? Surely the only alternatives to ensure a healthy role model is to use historians , who cannot let our children down. Florence Nightingale, Mother Theresa, Otto Schindler, Nelson Mandela , Ann Frank , Ghandi , Issac Newton , Martin Luther King, etc . But is this realistic, we cant pick role models for the children they choose them themselves?

So I put to you my opinion – The only role models we can truly rely upon are creative stimulus, ie characters in books, characters in TV programmes and the such? For example The Magic Sunglasses Project includes great role models. A book that continues into a workshop, then ongoing stories for your child to develop and learn. Auriel Blanche the author, understands children and their need for a positive role model. Her overall ambition is to connect and empower children on a global scale. Within her creative and innovative writing she inspires children to appreciate their self worth and to live happy and emotionally healthy lives. She engages children through her stories to use their imaginations to explore their dreams and to reach with in for their personal powers and specialties. She encourages children to live with respect for others and act with good manners and healthy attitudes. Throughout the book Samantha is always polite and friendly. She is playful and imaginative. She enjoys making her dreams come true and strives to reach her potential. She is a happy child, enthusiastic and charismatic. She is respectful of others and through self discovery learns how to cope with the challenges she faces with optimism and self worth. All of which are attributes that a role model should inspire to give. Samantha gives many good examples that the reader can emulate and learn from and is therefore a great role model. So please if you have a child please introduce them to Samantha. Have a look yourself at The Magic Sunglasses website - http://www.themagicsunglasses.com